Survivors Day

Survivors day is held every year on the Saturday before Thanksgiving (21st Nov 2015). For one day a year people affected by suicide can come together and share their pain and loss with others to help them feel less alone. 

The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention have recently released a series about suicide loss. They have also established a digital quilt for people to remember their loved ones by. 

"The Digital Memory Quilt is an online space where suicide loss survivors everywhere can honor and share stories about their loved ones using video, audio, photos, and words—stories that serve as squares in our virtual quilt." -extract from the Survivor Day website

There is much debate about whether suicide is heroic or cowardly but in my opinion none of this matters. What matters is that the person is gone. We almost kill ourselves thinking, how could I not have seen the signs. But sometimes there aren't any. Sometimes people are just so good at wearing their masks that we can't see through them. Even the greats have been fooled by a deadly disguise. 

But there was something that made that person want to disappear permanently. Something that made them think "I have no other option". And that is what we should worry about. That something probably still exists in our world and if it isn't stopped will continue to take those we love from us. So instead of judging those we've lost for their decisions why don't we think about what made them make that decision because everyday that is what a a family will think about when the person they love is gone. 

For anybody out there reading this thinking "nobody will miss me", don't do it. Just please don't do it. I could list a thousand reasons why but even if you think nobody will miss you, I will. I may not know you now but if you take your life, you take away the opportunity for me to know you. I will be missing maybe one day knowing you. And the time we didn't have together wasn't quite enough . 

If you are taking your life to escape a problem that seems permanent please don't because even if that problem is permanent now we can change it. But I can't help you change the problem if you're not here. 

I really don't know if what I've said here is of any help to anybody or has just made things worse. I'd like to believe it has helped someone. But honestly I don't know. I just hope it hasn't hurt anybody. I just wanted to say something. To let people know that they are not alone. There is so much I could say on this topic and so much I want to but I just can't put it into words. But I want anybody out there to know I am here for you. I will always care. I thought for a long time about what I wanted to say here and this is the best I could come up with.